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My Word of the Year for 2019

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As long as I can remember I’ve said “I’m sorry” for things I got guilted into doing. It’s a daily habit of mine. When someone bumps into my grocery cart or I have to squeeze myself around someone in an aisle, the words, “I am sorry,” instantly fly out of my mouth. 

Recently, I typed the words, “I am sorry” in an email. Why am I apologizing for turning down a last-minute invite when I have other commitments that day? That isn’t a thing I should be “sorry” for. That’s when I saw the light and realized it’s time to stop being sorry for everything! 

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Credit: Mallory Kee Photography {Outfit deets: Top: Target // Jeans: Stitch Fix // Clutch: Maskcara Beauty}

Unapologetic: My 2019 Word of The Year

Unapologetic: I can’t think of a better word to describe my focus for the new year. It may come across as brash and selfish, but it’s a choice I will not apologize for. 

The word “sorry” will be limited from my vocabulary. I am who I am, my priorities have changed. Life is too short to feel guilted into things or trying to be someone you are not. 

For example:

Can you attend a birthday party on XYZ? 

2018 Me: “I am so sorry, I really wish I could make it but I have this thing I already committed to. Ugh! I hate that I will miss your event.”

2019 Me: “Thank you for the invitation. I will not be able to attend this time. Have a great event!”

Sometimes less is more. I tend to over-explain myself. 

A work-related example:

Would you be willing to work on this opportunity for free? 

2017 Me: Yes

2018 Me: I am sorry, but right now I am only taking on paid work due to demand. 

2019 Me: I only provide my services for compensation. 

We must change our mindsets no matter how difficult it may be to break bad habits in both our personal and professional lives. It’s time to start thinking like a business person and remove emotion from the equation. That being said, the opportunities I do choose to do for free have to make sense to me and my business plans. (Note: I don’t judge those that do take on free work, but for me it has to make sense in the larger scale of things) 

Far from perfect

Of course, I will say I am sorry when I am in the wrong. I am far from perfect and I know I have my faults. I will make mistakes and when I do, I will own up to them and say, “I am sorry.” I want my apologies to be meaningful and not something I say multiple times a day. 

As women, I believe we have been conditioned to be quiet or feel guilty for doing things or making decisions that benefit ourselves. Whether that is the decision to ask your boss for a raise or go back to work forcing you to put your kids into daycare. I know at times I feel guilty for asking for things that will make me a happier and better person, but why? At the end of the day, when I lay my head on my pillow, it’s myself and my family that has to deal with the consequences – not an acquaintance, friend or internet troll that has nothing better to do than spew judgment and hate across my feed. 

When we as women voice our opinions and decisions strongly, we can be viewed as bitches instead of the secure, confident women we hope to be. We don’t ask for things that we deserve because we feel unworthy. We aren’t ourselves in fear of what others think of us. We commit to activities and pour our hearts into toxic relationships because we don’t know how to stop and we say we are sorry way too often for things we should NOT be sorry for. 

That ended in 2018. 

I will no longer apologize for simply being. 

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Credit: Mallory Kee Photography {Outfit deets: Top: Target // Jeans: Stitch Fix // Clutch: Maskcara Beauty}

Not everyone will get what I am doing and that’s okay

I get it, I am not going to be everyone’s cup of tea. I am driven to a point that could be annoying and I have big dreams and goals I wish to accomplish.

I take on too many projects. I am not afraid to try new things and to some, it appears my life is always perfect, but it’s not. I struggle with anxiety and depression. I yell at my kids at times. I forget to plan date nights with my husband because I am too tired. I am far from perfect. 

I spend minutes analyzing if I should post something on social media in fear that I am “sharing too much” and I might “annoy some folks.” 

Sometimes I fear what some people think when I voice my opinion. As a writer, this type of thinking brings my work to an abrupt and complete halt. With each passing day, I am becoming more comfortable with the skin I am in. This is my journey that I choose to share with the world. 

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Credit: Mallory Kee Photography {Outfit deets: Top: Target }

It’s okay to unfollow 

Now is the time to start living and stop apologizing for sharing the good, bad and ugly (if you feel comfortable) parts of our lives. If what I do, say or publish makes you feel uncomfortable, I encourage you to unfollow. The decluttering challenge is great, but it doesn’t include decluttering our social lives. If something or someone is not providing value and joy to your world it’s okay to let it go.

(Please don’t read between the lines and try to figure out whom I am talking about because there isn’t one person I can think of. In general, it’s society.) 

I am giving you permission to let go of my social feed if it’s not a good fit. I am an “over-sharer” who loves to create content and share my life experiences with you as writing is what brings me joy. 

More energy into the ones that deserve it

Why do we put so much effort into people that don’t put effort into us? 

It’s not just me feeling this way. 

I have had multiple conversations with successful women who are quick to see the negative over all the positive feedback and support they receive. We dwell on the bad, ignore the good and get stuck in a cycle of self-pity. Believe me, I have been there multiple times in both my personal and professional career.

We forget about all our cheerleaders and focus on that one negative comment or look of judgment that came our way. May our struggles strengthen us and show us who we don’t want to become and who we were meant to be. Remember that every relationship has a season and a reason. 

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Credit: Mallory Kee Photography {Outfit deets: Top: Target // Jeans: Stitch Fix // Clutch: Maskcara Beauty}

I will continue to work hard to live the life I have always envisioned without regrets. For that, I will not apologize. 

I encourage you to do the same and I am NOT sorry if this article wasted your time. 

Cheers to the New Year and THANK YOU for all your love and support. 

What is your 2019 word of the year? 

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Photo by Mallory Kee Photography

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By Michelle Hancock | January 8, 2019

Comments

  1. Dwan says

    January 8, 2019 at 3:20 pm

    My word this year is HAPPY. I am doing things that will bring me joy. If it makes me happy, great. If it does not bring me true happiness, I’m saying no. If I want to take a day to relax and watch TV or read a book that makes me happy, I’m no longer feeling guilty or putting it off because I feel I need to be more ‘productive’ that day. I just want to be happy! So with each decision, I am asking myself what makes me happy. I love your word and outlook. Good for you!

  2. Michelle Hancock says

    January 10, 2019 at 9:46 pm

    Living guilt-free is the way to be! Thanks for reading!

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Meet Michelle

Dallas Blogger 

 Hi, I’m Michelle. My mission is to help moms believe in themselves through realistic parenting hacks that make life with kids easier and more fun!



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Road Trip time to visit our partners at @kalaharir Road Trip time to visit our partners at @kalahariresorts in #RoundRockTX. We have been anxiously waiting the opening of this brand new resort that hosts a variety of family activities including America’s Largest Indoor Waterpark. For the first day, we explored, played in the huge and spacious arcade known as Tom Foolery’s Adventure Park. Also visited Cinco Ninos for dinner! If you are looking for a weekend trip definitely consider it! It’s very clean and I’ve seen the staff stay on top of safety precautions (so far). Watch our stories for more info! #KalahariTX #loveKalahari #TexasTravels #texastravel
❤️ I see Valentine’s Day gifts in the stores ❤️ I see Valentine’s Day gifts in the stores now so here we go... Save this no bake Valentine’s Day Puppy Chow recipe. So easy the kids can help you. Beware though they may try to sneak some bites and so will you. Recipe in link or at ModernMomLife.com
It’s true, anytime I don’t meal plan my week c It’s true, anytime I don’t meal plan my week can be chaotic. Impulse purchases and unhealthy eating increases in my world. Swipe right to check out our free weekly meal planner with blank recipe cards. Get them on the blog now. Head to link in profile or visit ModernMomLife.com. Less stress and saving money is always a win! 👏👏👏 #mealplanning #mealplanner #modernmomlife #weekdaymeals #mealplanningmommies #mealplanningmadeeasy
Cold front is coming and we might get snow in Texa Cold front is coming and we might get snow in Texas! (Fingers crossed) learn how to make your own hot chocolate bombs and save money at the same time! Head to ModernMomLife.com for Winter Hot Chocolate bombs recipe! It’s the best hot chocolate you will ever taste and the kids go nuts over the process! #hotchocolatebombs #hotchocolate #winterdrinks #winterrecipes #winterdessert #familyfun #kidsinthekitchen
Happy New Year! This year was tough but we are so Happy New Year! This year was tough but we are so thankful for the extra time we spent together as a family. 2020 taught me a lot about myself and what kind of life I want to live right now and once the pandemic is over.  Last year we hosted a party on NYE and I’m sure we opened a portal to this chaos.  This year is much different. Tonight we will most likely be in bed by 10 pm and I am okay with that! We are currently in mismatched jammies at 5 pm. 😜  Cheers to a new year and whatever that will look like! I’m not picking a new word nor am I doing resolutions for the first time in years. I have no expectations but keeping hope alive that things will get better and we can gather and hug once again soon.  Praying for those who are hurting and struggling right now. Things will get better... they simply have to! Let’s go, 2021.
Nothing like a sunset in West Texas. #roadtrippin Nothing like a sunset in West Texas. #roadtrippin #LubbockTX #Texasskies #TexasSunset

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Road Trip time to visit our partners at @kalaharir Road Trip time to visit our partners at @kalahariresorts in #RoundRockTX. We have been anxiously waiting the opening of this brand new resort that hosts a variety of family activities including America’s Largest Indoor Waterpark. For the first day, we explored, played in the huge and spacious arcade known as Tom Foolery’s Adventure Park. Also visited Cinco Ninos for dinner! If you are looking for a weekend trip definitely consider it! It’s very clean and I’ve seen the staff stay on top of safety precautions (so far). Watch our stories for more info! #KalahariTX #loveKalahari #TexasTravels #texastravel
❤️ I see Valentine’s Day gifts in the stores ❤️ I see Valentine’s Day gifts in the stores now so here we go... Save this no bake Valentine’s Day Puppy Chow recipe. So easy the kids can help you. Beware though they may try to sneak some bites and so will you. Recipe in link or at ModernMomLife.com
It’s true, anytime I don’t meal plan my week c It’s true, anytime I don’t meal plan my week can be chaotic. Impulse purchases and unhealthy eating increases in my world. Swipe right to check out our free weekly meal planner with blank recipe cards. Get them on the blog now. Head to link in profile or visit ModernMomLife.com. Less stress and saving money is always a win! 👏👏👏 #mealplanning #mealplanner #modernmomlife #weekdaymeals #mealplanningmommies #mealplanningmadeeasy
Cold front is coming and we might get snow in Texa Cold front is coming and we might get snow in Texas! (Fingers crossed) learn how to make your own hot chocolate bombs and save money at the same time! Head to ModernMomLife.com for Winter Hot Chocolate bombs recipe! It’s the best hot chocolate you will ever taste and the kids go nuts over the process! #hotchocolatebombs #hotchocolate #winterdrinks #winterrecipes #winterdessert #familyfun #kidsinthekitchen
Happy New Year! This year was tough but we are so Happy New Year! This year was tough but we are so thankful for the extra time we spent together as a family. 2020 taught me a lot about myself and what kind of life I want to live right now and once the pandemic is over.  Last year we hosted a party on NYE and I’m sure we opened a portal to this chaos.  This year is much different. Tonight we will most likely be in bed by 10 pm and I am okay with that! We are currently in mismatched jammies at 5 pm. 😜  Cheers to a new year and whatever that will look like! I’m not picking a new word nor am I doing resolutions for the first time in years. I have no expectations but keeping hope alive that things will get better and we can gather and hug once again soon.  Praying for those who are hurting and struggling right now. Things will get better... they simply have to! Let’s go, 2021.
Nothing like a sunset in West Texas. #roadtrippin Nothing like a sunset in West Texas. #roadtrippin #LubbockTX #Texasskies #TexasSunset
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